Under nine weeks to go and this morning while I was grunting on the kitchen floor squeezing out just one more push up, it hit me. COT is coming directly at me and it can no longer be pushed to the back burner. So for the first time since I began this whole process forever ago I am having the taste of fear in the back of my throat.
It is difficult to qualify the fear. Is it the fear of failure? The fear of being the old guy in the mass of twenty-somethings? The fear that I will be overweight? The fear of failing the PT? The fear of appearing to be a total joke? The answer is yes to all!
I suppose the fear is universal. We all go through those Maxwell gates with the unknown ahead of us and we must cope and find a way to be shaped as the USAF sees fit. I am well practiced in keeping my mouth shut and doing as I am told. I think the yelling and the chance of being wrong are a wee outside my comfort zone.
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