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So much has happened since my last check in. So I was horribly depressed when CT left and I was feeling like my heart was ripped out of my chest. I thought about writing him, but didn't. Plus he had not written me. Days passed and I decided it was all for the best and I could work hard and get over him. As fate would have it I sort of hook-Ed up with a very cute army guy and we had a nice evening with promises of many more to come. The very next day I stroll into work and there is CT. All smiles and happy to see everyone. It was like one of those times where the world comes to a complete stop. Since then things have picked up where they left off. I follow him around and he leads me by my nose and the army guy is history. I am right back in the gut wrenching longing and hoping phase. This time it feels ten times worse. Don't get me wrong - he is amazing but to him I do not seem to be so amazing.